People talk about having imposter syndrome in their businesses but sometimes, I feel I have this in my personal home life.
I adore being a mother of two healthy happy children, a wife to a kind man, living in a wonderful village and town in Norfolk with beautiful friends.
However, I am not just a wife, mother, nurse maid, cleaner, cook, organiser of children’s activities, diplomat etc. I used to be just me. Not someone who has to justify everything I do.
I used to be an adventurous, thrill seeking, lone traveller, social butterfly who had a great job in Financial PR, who went on the most amazing holidays and world travels, volunteered with aids orphans in Africa and Elephants in Sri Lanka. I went around Cuba on my own, at times wondering what the hell I had done! I travelled through the Amazon, swimming with Pink Dolphins and Caiman, eating roasted Piranha for supper after catching them, whilst they tried to bite my shins in a boat. I camped out in a cow shed in -2 degrees in the Pantanal, for fun!
Recently my partner asked me to text him to let him know I was ok. I thought, well, you know, I’ve walked through the streets of Havana alone at 3am so I think I should be safe in Norfolk.
We are expected to take on a role in life when children come along, but I find myself battling to be me, just once in a while. Every now and again. Don’t hold me down or try to control. Let me out of here…